How To Stop Lying And Regain The Trust Of People Around You
Become honest for your sake and that of everyone else.
You’re a liar; shame on you.
At least you’ve recognized the problem and can now begin to work towards fixing it.
If you are reading this article, I am going to assume that you’re a liar who wants to recover. If not, there is not much relevant information for you here.
Why You Need To Stop Lying
Not only does lying hurt those around you, but it also destroys your reputation faster than almost anything else.
No one will trust you or want to be around you if you are a known liar. By the way, don’t think you’re smart enough not to get caught.
Even if you manage to avoid getting caught for a time, the truth will eventually come out, one way or another. You will face the consequences of your actions either way. The consequences of lying far outweigh any temporary and fleeting benefits.
Liars face a significantly worse quality of life than those who are honest.
How To Stop Lying
In most cases, stopping lying is as simple as it sounds — just stop. Make the decision to pursue truth over falsehoods, and the rest should sort itself out.
However, this can be more difficult if you have become a habitual liar and lying has become second nature to you. Then, you will be working against an established habit. Habits can be difficult to break, especially negative ones, but not impossible.
In the case of a habitual lying habit, you need to take the same steps as with any bad habit. Once formed, you cannot destroy a habit, but you can replace a bad habit with a good one.
Discover your trigger that makes you feel like you need to lie. Then, whenever you feel that trigger, do something different instead of lying. What this is is up to you.
All that matters is that it is something other than lying.
If you’ve done it correctly, then that should have prevented you from lying. However, if you weren’t fast enough and you tell an untruth, correct yourself. It might be embarrassing to admit to someone that you just lied to them, but it is an important step you need to take.
Different people will react differently to this, but they will at least recognize that you are making an effort to improve yourself. Chances are you already have the reputation of being a liar, so you likely don’t have that much to lose anyway.
They will appreciate a small improvement over no improvement.
Setting Realistic Expectations
Trust is easily broken but very difficult to reform.
Just because you stop lying for a few weeks doesn’t mean everyone will magically trust you again. It can take many months and sometimes even years of consistent honesty before you will even start being trusted again.
That depends on how severe your lying habit was.
The more severe the habit, the longer it will take for you to be trusted again, and one single relapse can reset your timer.
Additionally, some people will never trust you again. This is a harsh truth and one that I’m sure you do not want to hear, but it is the truth.
Once you’ve remade yourself into an honest person, you may need to seek out a new social circle. That way, you can start over and create a new reputation as the better person you’ve become. Be warned, however, that your reputation can still follow you.
The good news is that if you have established yourself with the reputation of being an honest person, the negative impacts of your old reputation will be minimal.
If they catch wind of your old reputation, they may be suspicious for a while, but if you consistently remain honest, they will recognize and may even respect the fact that you’ve changed.
That’s something that not many people will do.
Anyone can change, but most people won’t put in the effort due to their ego, laziness, or other factors. Being different shows that you’re dedicated to being a better person.
Wrap up
Dishonesty is always a choice. You can choose to lie and deceive, or you can choose to be moral and honest. Either way, you will be left with the consequences of your actions, be they good or bad.
Personally, I prefer good consequences over bad ones.
It is cliché as hell, but honesty is the best policy. Do what you will, but I hope you will make your best efforts to improve and become a better person.
That is part of pacing towards perfection.